A Haunting We Will Go
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A Haunting We Will Go
by Red Witch
Summary: Halloween is just another confusing Earth holiday for Goose. And his friends make it even more confusing.
The disclaimer saying that I don't own any Galaxy Rangers characters has been stuffed into a pumpkin. Here's another fun fic that came out of my mind after I asked myself a simple question. How would a Supertrooper react to Halloween?
"Listen to the children of the night," Zachery Foxx growled in a sexy voice as he held the cape over his face. "They tell me to suck your blood! Blah!" He pulled away the cape to reveal a pair of fangs. "BLAH!"
"That's not what they're saying," Shane Gooseman gave his captain a look. "They're saying something else sucks."
"Come on Gooseman! Get into the spirit of Halloween!" Zach spoke in his best Dracula imitation. "Blah!"
"If I didn't know better I'd think the spirit of alcohol got into you," Shane gave him another look.
"I think it's great that we're having a Halloween party here at BETA," Zach Jr. said. He was dressed up as a Galaxy Ranger.
"It is a nice break, especially since the Queen of the Crown got her throne dented slightly a few weeks ago," Doc remarked, referring to the incident with the Po Empire. He was dressed as a Musketeer. "I swear she looses armadas like most people lose car keys."
"This party is for more than the kids," Zach said. "It's another chance to promote goodwill among the League and Tarkon. Especially since the last affair ended up as a bit of a disaster. So you'd better get dressed Goose."
"I am dressed," Shane indicated his black cowboy outfit.
"Goose you wear that almost all the time!" Zach Jr. said, exasperated. "The point of Halloween is dressing up as something you're not!"
"Why?" Shane asked.
"It's called fun," Zach gave him a look. "You know, pretending?"
"Sounds stupid to me," Shane grunted, folding his arms.
"Not surprising," Doc grinned. "You forget Captain for the Goose nearly every day is Halloween. He's changed into more creatures than Lon Cheney."
"Who?" Zach Jr. asked.
"Before your time son," Zach told him. "Or mine for that matter."
"Look I just don't understand this whole Halloween thing," Shane grunted. "I get that little kids like to dress up and get candy. But why do adults like dressing up in stupid costumes and scaring each other silly? Our lives are scary enough as it is."
"Sorry Gooseman," Zach pointed at him. "You are not getting out of this. You are going to dress up and have fun like the rest of us. That's an order!"
"Guys! No! Come on!" Shane protested as he was dragged away by Doc and Zach. "This is not funny!"
"Don't worry Goose! You'll love it!" Doc said cheerfully as they took him to a large room where several costumes were lying around.
"I highly doubt it," Shane wondered, trying to mull over which would be more preferable, this situation or a week in the stockade. Then he realized if he fought off Doc and Zach there would probably be paperwork.
Shane really hated paperwork.
"What costume would really be good for the Gooseman?" Doc sorted through the large assortment of costumes.
"I am not doing this!" Shane protested. "I am not going to try on clothes for your amusement like I'm some kind of doll!"
"This for your own good Goose," Zach told him. "You need to learn how to play and have fun."
"I do know how to have fun," Shane folded his arms. "I have fun by playing 'How to Turn People into Human Pretzels'. Playing dress up is not fun."
"Of course it is, especially if you and your wife feel like…" Zach began then stopped.
"That is way too much information," Shane blinked.
"No wonder you miss your wife so much," Doc added. "But the man has a point. Think of this as a lesson in humanity."
"You mean a lesson in how insane humans can be?" Shane remarked.
"Try this one," Doc shoved a pirate costume at him. "This might be you."
"Forget it," Shane gave him a look. "There is no way I am doing this."
Five minutes later…
"I can't believe you talked me into this…" Shane groaned, hating what he saw in the mirror. He was in a white pirate shirt, brown vest, pirate pants and boots with a saber in a red sash around his waist and a red bandana on his head. "I look like an escapee from Pirates of the Caribbean."
"I always did like that ride," Zach admitted.
"It was a ride too?" Shane did a double take. "Forget it, I don't want to know."
"Wait I haven't shown you the best part of the costume!" Doc grinned as he went around back. He brought something out. "Ta da!"
"You have got to be kidding me?" Shane moaned in agony.
"Awwk! Awwk! Avast ye me hearties! Hoist the mainsail!" Bubblehead dressed in a little pirate outfit of his own fluttered and landed on Shane's shoulder. "Let loose the other sales! There's a sale at Pennys!"
"Now that's cute," Zach grinned. "The perfect accessory. Bubblehead is a great parrot."
"Pieces of eight nine and ten!" Bubblehead chirped.
"Great, first the Supertroopers go insane now my team mates," Shane grumbled.
"Come on Goose! Let's show everyone how you look," Zach steered him out of the room.
"You expect people to see me in this?" Shane shouted.
"Come on Gooseman it's not like we're asking you to walk the plank," Doc said as he pushed him.
"I'd rather walk the plank!" Shane told him. "Better yet I'll make the two of you walk the plank!"
"Relax Gooseman it's not like you're the only one dressed up," Zach remarked. They were in the main hallway where several humans and aliens were dressed up. "It's a party. Enjoy yourself."
"I'll enjoy myself after the party when I can take this crap off," Shane grumbled.
"Hey guys," Niko walked up to them wearing a red fighting outfit and her hair was put up in two pom poms. "Glad to see you made it. Goose you look great."
"Uh thanks," Shane blinked looking at her form fitting costume. "You too."
"Yeah but I think we're nowhere near the first place like him," Doc pointed.
"And I wasn't even trying to win first place," Buzzwang walked in dressed up like the Queen of the Crown.
"Now that is a scary costume," Zach snorted.
"Thank you Ranger Foxx," Buzzwang said. "I was inspired by that little adventure we had in that Po children's story. I think this outfit is quite slimming on me."
"Hey Dad!" Jessica walked up wearing a princess costume. Her brother was behind her. "They're carving some pumpkins! You want to help us?"
"Sure! Sounds like fun!" Zach grinned. "Come on Goose."
"This night is never going to end," Shane groaned as he was led away. "Now I know where they got the horror part of this celebration from."
Pretty soon the Rangers and several children and aliens were at a table carving faces into pumpkins. Well almost all of them.
"What I don't get is the carving of faces into vegetables," Shane looked at the pumpkin in front of him. "I guess it's better than eating them."
"A lot of cultures use carvings in vegetables as part of their cultural celebration," Niko gave him a grin. "Come on Goose give it a try."
"That's kind of messy don't you think?" Shane winced as he saw Zach scoop his hand in and pull out pumpkin guts.
"Since when are you squeamish?" Zach gave him a look.
"Since there's an easier and a less messier way of doing it," Shane grinned as he pulled out his blaster which he had hidden in his belt. He set the setting on low and started to shoot a small face into the pumpkin.
"Well that's one way to carve a pumpkin," Doc remarked. "A psychotic way but you gotta admit it's creative."
"No fuss, no mess…" Shane grinned.
"Unless you make a mistake and blow it up," Zach winced as pieces of pumpkin fell everywhere. "So much for eliminating a mess."
"Uh sorry," Shane gulped. "Uh Commander Walsh isn't here right?"
"He's at an important meeting but you know he's gonna find out about this," Doc said as some people slipped on pieces of pumpkin.
"Whee! I'm the Great Pumpkin!" Bubblehead poked his head out of another pumpkin.
"Let's go get some punch," Niko guided Shane away from the mess. "And try to blend in with the crowd."
"Sorry about all that," Shane sighed. "I guess you can take the Supertrooper out of the shooting gallery but you can't take the shooting gallery out of the Supertrooper."
"The important thing to remember is that you tried and no one got seriously hurt," Niko told him as she moved to the dance floor with him.
"Yeah but I still wish I wore a mask to this thing," Shane grumbled as people nervously got out of the way as they danced.
"I don't think it would have mattered much," Niko gave him a smile. "Something tells me people still would have figured out it was you."
"I guess," Shane let out a breath as they danced around. "They didn't exactly have too many holidays back at Wolf Den. Well I know me and a lot of the Supertroopers celebrated every time Kilbane got locked up in the stockade. But other than that…Did they have Halloween on Xanadu?"
"Not like on Earth," Niko admitted. "We did however celebrate the Night of Those Passed where we remembered our loved ones and tried to contact spirits from the great beyond. Actually worked one or two times."
"That must have been interesting," Shane raised an eyebrow.
"It was a lot of fun," Niko said. "We sang songs, played games, ate a small feast…Set a large wicker man on fire."
"Now that I can get into," Shane grinned.
"It was ceremonial," Niko lightly punched him. "I guess neither of us has much experience with traditional Earth holidays."
"I know, sometimes I feel like an alien on my own planet," Shane let out a sigh. "Even Waldo and Zozo know more about human traditions than I do."
"Speaking of which where are they?" Niko looked around. "Oh by the punch bowl."
"Splashy Splashy!" Bubblehead was splashing in the punch bowl. Waldo, Zozo and other alien ambassadors were looking rather appalled.
"Maybe if we move over here we can pretend we've never seen that bird in our entire lives?" Shane grumbled.
"I think there's a space behind that potted plant," Niko went with him.
They were met up with by Doc and Zach. "Now for the fun part of the evening," Doc grinned as he showed him a large sack. "Here are the supplies!"
"Toilet paper, shaving cream and eggs?" Shane looked at the bag. "What's this for?"
"It's a little Halloween tradition I think it's time you were introduced to," Doc smiled. "You've heard of trick or treat? Well this is the trick part."
"Vandalism is part of a Halloween tradition?" Shane blinked.
"It is since we're going to pay a visit to Senator Wheiner's place," Doc grinned.
"I'm in," Shane agreed.
"So am I," Niko added.
"Even though this is against the law I think I can enjoy this," Zach agreed. "Let's roll."
An hour later…
"This was extremely childish," Zach folded his arms.
"I agree," Niko said. "Very childish and immature."
"Fun as hell though," Shane grinned.
"Oh yes, definitely," Zach grinned.
"I must admit Captain you do good work," Doc grinned happily. "That bionic arm of yours really gets in a good toss."
"It's not just that," Zach admired all the toilet paper strung up all over the trees and the roof of the mansion. "I kind of did a lot of this thing in high school and college."
"You? A vandal?" Shane asked in a mock tone. "How shocking!"
"I could TP an entire block of houses in under an hour and still have time to hit our rival high school," Zach admitted. "It was only before a big football game. School tradition. Although I must admit Niko you have a pretty good arm as well."
"Thank you Zachery," Niko smiled. "I especially like the shaving cream decorations Goose and Doc did over the windows and the Mercedes."
"It was child's play to deactivate the security system," Doc grinned. "But what happened to the eggs? I can't find them."
"Oh I used them," Shane grinned.
"I don't see them on the windows or the walls of the house," Doc looked around. "Goose you do know you're supposed to throw them on the outside of the house right?"
"Outside the house?" Shane blinked.
"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HOUSE? THERE ARE BROKEN EGGS ALL OVER THE PLACE?" The howling of Senator Wheiner could be heard outside.
"Uh oh…" Doc gulped. The rangers jumped into some nearby bushes as Wheiner staggered outside, covered in eggs and wearing a bathrobe and pajamas.
"Goose!" Niko hissed.
"He was passed out drunk in the living room," Shane told her. "I couldn't resist. Nobody told me that those eggs were only supposed to be used outdoors!"
"How did you get in?" Zach asked.
"Like Doc said it was surprisingly easy," Shane shrugged.
"YOU STUPID KIDS! COME ON OUT! I KNOW YOU'RE STILL HERE!" Wheiner screamed.
"Now what do we do?" Zach whispered.
"I have an idea…" Shane smirked. "Niko…See that pumpkin over there?"
"I got it," Niko grinned as she touched her badge, using her powers to move the pumpkin around.
"GHOST! AAAAAAHH!" Wheiner screamed as the pumpkin flew around and smashed into a nearby tree. "No…There are no such things as ghosts. It's just the vodka talking. There are no such things as ghosts!"
"I can't pass this opportunity up," Shane grinned as he lightly touched his badge underneath his costume. He focused on a form he took a long time ago. He popped out of the bushes as a green scaly monster with large teeth.
"MONSTER! AAAAAAAHHHH!" Wheiner screamed and fled down the block.
"Well that should scar him for life," Doc quipped.
"You know something?" Shane grinned as he changed back. "Maybe Halloween isn't so bad after all?"